Welcome to the second week! This week we will navigate through the world of emotions. First, identifying them and then looking at how they affect our decisions, our relationships, and our ability to learn! Emotions are a vital part of the human experience. While being filled with emotion is normal (whether joy or anger for example), being overwhelmed by them and led by them into decisions we wouldn’t normally make, is not something we need to allow. We can feel what we are feeling and know that these emotions have purpose! We can stay firmly planted in our commitments and not be swept away by them.
Basic Emotions
Let's look at some baic emotions that are common to the human experience. Glad, mad, sad, and afrad.
Glad
Gladness happens when we are genuinely happy, feel a sense of accomplishment, see a new-born baby, are experiencing the natural freedom being in nature, enjoying a good meal with friends and family, watch as someone with a disability crosses the finish line of a marathon after overcoming great struggle!
Mad
This is when we are experiencing anger, at ourselves, another person, our situation or our circumstances. We can be mad about a man being falsely accused and sent to jail, about losing the big game, about losing a job, a relationship, or just being annoyed in traffic. We may also be mad about others telling us what to do, or about having to do the dishes!
Sad
Sadness often comes when we are missing someone, or our expectations are not met. Losing a loved one or a pet will often bring sadness and is a normal part of the grieving process. Perhaps on a rainy day, we have a sense of being sad, and we are not sure why?
Afrad!
No this is not a typo! This is a combination of emotions. Fear, frustration, sadness, etc…This can be a good word to identify with when emotions are all mixed up. This can come as a somewhat intense flood of emotion.
Whatever the emotion we are experiencing, it is important to learn to identify what we are feeling, especially in a crisis. When we experience traumatic events and the ground underneath us is shifting, there will often be a few main emotions present.
Learn to be present with your emotions, be honest about them, and identify whether it is a new emotion or an old familiar one.
Also, emotions often are associated with different parts of the body. Do you feel it in your gut?
Your heart?
Your head?
Your body?
Whatever you are feeling, these emotions are a part of your personal story! They are not something to run from. Before we watch today’s video from Dr. Rosenberg, try this exercise.
Suggested Action Step
Sit quietly in your chair and take a few deep breaths. Consider what you have been experiencing lately and how you are feeling now. What are the emotions you are feeling? Are they connected to any particular place in your body? Warm your hands up by rubbing them together and put them over that place, holding them there (your face, your gut, your heart, your head). Continue to take full breaths. After allowing yourself to be present with these emotions, know that you are not alone in feeling them-others are experiencing them too. Now, watch the video called: The Gift of Unpleasant Emotions, by Joan Rosenberg.
Would making more decisions lead you to being more action oriented?
How do you experience emotions as a feeling in your body?
Navigating through unpleasant feelings, according to Dr. Rosenberg, can help to bring us back to who we are more fully. She discusses these different “negative” emotions and tells us that it is our moment to moment choices rather than our big choices that often affect us the most. She also talks about riding the wave of emotions. Identifying what we are feeling and allowing those feelings to come to the surface helps us to come through them.
The emotion starts as a feeling in the body. We tend to distract ourselves from those feelings. Learning to ride the wave of unpleasant emotions brings a growing confidence and emotional strength. Remember, emotional waves are temporary and are connected to the path that leads you back to being more fully you!
Talking to a professional counselor or spiritual director can be so beneficial in navigating through crisis or difficult crossroads!
Question for Reflection: How many decisions are you aware of making each day? 10, 20, more? What are 5 decisions you made today?
Helpful Links
- 90 Seconds to a Life You Love (Kindle Edition)
- Ease Your Anxiety: How to Gain Confidence, Emotional Strength and Inner Peace (Kindle Edition)